Dream Log 5/29

Just woke up from a dream that I did not want to end. It started off a little strange but ended great!

We begin in a town similar to Sioux Falls, I think I was visiting friends. I was driving to meet someone somewhere and missed a turn so I decided to just keep going down the road I was currently on. I started speeding, and finally got to the end of the road, it was a big store like Wal Mart, but wasn't a WM. While wandering around the store I entered another building and suddenly was at my wedding.

The place was small and had windows looking out to the mountains. The guests were making their way in and at one point there were tables all over and each table and a mini cake on it that the guests were to share. Someone was angry that all they got was a tiny piece of cake and I pointed out that there was still a larger cake up front.

I was being a bit of a bridezilla throughout the rest of the dream, but it was over things that were legit. There were about 5 mom's with their small children sitting right up front, and the children were being so noisy that when the wedding started I knew that they would drown out any other sound on the video. So I asked that they move to the back.

I had 2 bridesmaids and one other girl was there in this weird flowing white gown thing that kinda looked like a satin sheet toga. She was supposed to be the flower girl or something, but I didn't really want her there because she kept trying to be the center of attention. My sister was one of the bridesmaids but the other was a girl I have never met, but it felt like we were the best of friends.

Finally it was time for the ceremony to start but things were still a little chaotic, guests were still arriving and as the groomsmen started walking out I was still in the main room. I was pissed at the number of people who were late and mad that we were starting without them.

Once everyone got to the proper places we were actually ready to start. Did I mention that in the dream I still hadn't figured out who the groom was? Well the groomsmen and groom got to their places and while the bridesmaids made their way down the isle, I was sneaking peaks at the groom...let me say that me dreaming didn't know who it was, but the me as a bride did.

He ended up being someone I had a HUGE thing for back in high school! Needless to say it was a good dream even though I woke up right after I figured out who the groom was.

Spring Cleaning

Well spring has finally arrive in Buffalo WY and with it comes that overwhelming task of spring cleaning. I find myself in need of a good cleaning in several different aspects of my life. The first is the physical, over the past year or so I have really let my space (being my tiny little room at home) get overly cluttered and just plain messy. I’ve always been a "throw it on the desk now and deal with it later" kind of person and that is why my room gets the way it does. However this year has been a little different, between poor health and a very hectic schedule I had very little downtime and when I did get it I generally just wanted to veg. But that is no excuse for only taking out the trash when its overflowing or letting the space under my bed become my filing cabinet.

So, in the next few weeks I will be pulling EVERYTHING (minus the bed and other large furniture) out of my room and going through it all. Its time to get rid of the stuff that clutters up my spaces. My rules for keeping things: sentimental value must be a 7 or above. If I don’t use it it goes. If I haven’t worn it in the last 6 months it goes. So…be on the look out for photos of my decluttering process! This will also make my move in August go more smoothly as I will have already gone through everything and will have boxed much of it up.

Second, I need to do some cleaning in my social life, and this may sound a little strange but it means that I will be going through my Facebook friends and removing connections to people that I either don’t talk to or people that may not be good influences on my life….don’t worry there aren’t very many of them and if you read my blog you probably won’t be one of the removed connections. Its just something I feel I need to do.

Thirdly, and most importantly I need to do some spiritual spring cleaning. This is the part that will be the hardest and will take the longest because I have a lot of skeletons in my closets…Things that I need to talk to God about and actually hand over to Him. I've always had trouble handing things to Him and completely surrendering my life to Him. I just like to be in control, or at least I like to think that I am in control.

I’ve been in a spiritual dessert lately, my home church is no longer a place where I feel I can grow as a Believer. I find that I have been turned off by many “Christians” and all their “Christian” things. I am a firm believer in God and I want to persue my relationship with Him, but I feel that the “Christian” community has become so bogged down with doctrines and poltics and other childish behavior that none of what they teach seems real to me. I want to find a body of believers who want to a. worship God, b. encourage and uplift one another, c. be real with one another and d. spread the Gospel in a real way not the candy coated “Christian” way.

As I search for a new body of believers to plug into I will be doing some serious soul searching and praying. Weeding out the things that get in the way of my relationship with Christ. I know that He has a plan and that He is going to do some amazing things in my life, and in order for those things to come to fruition my heart needs some serious cleaning.

Spring has always been a time of renewal for me. The rain falls and nourishes the plants which then grow and produce beautiful flowers and green stuff. Baby animals are running around in that cute baby way signifying a new-ness and a clean slate. And we start wearing our summer clothes and shoes. Everything seems so fresh and new. For me, Spring is New Years and that's when I make my resolutions. This year I want to clean out my life and then continue to keep it clean.

Let the cleaning begin!!!!