Waiting for life to Start

I've always thought myself a fairly patient person. I mean, I'm no saint, but
I've waited for years for that someone special to come along;
I've waited for God's still small voice to tell me what path to choose;
I've done a lot of waiting on people.

Waiting, to me, is just another part of life.
We wait in lines,
We wait on the phone,
We wait for answers,
We wait for good times to come,
We wait for bad times to pass,
We wait for things to grow,
We wait on other people to decide,
We wait to make our own decisions.

Wait wait wait. To tell the truth I'm starting to get impatient!

Once again I find myself waiting to find out what path God wants me to choose. There is a job I want, but still haven't heard about. I told God last night that if this job doesn't pan out then I am taking it to mean that He has a bigger plan for me and that I should start pursuing a different avenue. The problem is there are two choices I see before me:
1. Start looking at mission work that I can incorporate my theatre background into.
or
2. Start seriously looking at grad schools and pursue a career as a theatre professor.

So we'll discuss the first option.

I've felt called to some kind of ministry, for a while I thought I would be a missionary, but that didn't seem right. Then I totally ignored God and did my own thing (big mistake. I was miserable!). Now that I am trying to follow God's plan for my life I can't seem to lay a finger on what I should do.

The Bible says that when we follow God, He'll give us our heart's desire. My heart's desire is to marry and have kids. But I have yet to be involved romantically. I have a very specific "list" of qualifications for a future husband, and while I have met a few guys that "strike my fancy," none have been interested in me. I trust that God will provide the right man for me, I just don't know what I am supposed to do in the mean time!

Anyways back to the missions thing. I would love to spend a year or two as a "semester missionary" in a church where I could do drama and all that. But in looking at my options through my church I find that most organizations don't like you to have any kind of debt. Well, that rules me out! I have lots of student loans to pay off.

However I haven't looked that hard yet. But as I have a renewed sense of purpose I know that if this is what God wants me to do He will open doors for me. Heck, He might close a door and open a window to a totally unexpected opportunity! I just need to be on the lookout.

Option two: grad school.
If I went back to school I want to be part of a program that will cater to my personal interests. I want to direct and teach. I think I should take some more in-depth directing classes. And I think I need to take, as scary as they would be for me!, acting classes. I'd also like to take classes on how to manage theatre groups. So far most of the schools I've looked at via their websites offer bits and pieces of the things I think are important. Of course I don't know exactly what I would need to know!

Also, if I am going to go back to school I really don't want to have to spend too much more in student loans! Its already a scary thing to think about!

Another thing for me to think about is studying abroad. This is something I have always wanted to do but the opportunity never came up. In looking for schools I have considered looking in the UK and New Zealand. I would love to spend a few years outside of America. Ideally I would love to go to a small school in the London area.

So much to be thinking and praying about. Even if I get the job I'm waiting to hear about I will have to make some sort of choice in the Spring. So I guess that if I get the job I have more time to think about things and pray about them and discuss my options. If I don't then I'll feel more pressured to make a choice now.

New Blog

You know my life must be pretty boring when I have created a second blog....
Which I have. Its called Someone's Words and its a place where I have begun to catalog some quotes from books, movies, music, people, etc. I've wanted to start a journal of quotes but somehow that never happened. So...a blog will have to suffice for now.
Here's the link: www.someoneswords.blogspot.com Check it out when you want to peruse the recesses of my crazy mind through the quotes I enjoy. :)
Leave your thoughts in the comments!

A Well in the Wilderness

Today while at work I asked our maintenance man (we'll call him M.) if he was going to vote tomorrow. Through the conversation we ended up sharing our testamonies with each other. I was amazed to hear the vast difference in his to mine. I grew up at church, was a good girl, and became a Christian at age 8. I've never done drugs, stolen anything, had sex, or even been really drunk. In contrast M.'s mother died when he was young and his father did not care for him. His youth was spent as a thief, druggie, and ended up in jail. One of his former partners became a Christian and shared the story with M. Today M. is a strong Christian, and totally on fire for God.
The conversation gave me hope as he reminded me that no matter where I am, in serving God and being faithful, God will also be faithful and will bring me joy. I tend to take God's grace for granted. Yesterday Donnie's sermon on the current state of affairs in the US reminded me that we have a lot to be thankful for. We truly are a blessed country and we take that for granted.
II Cronicles 7:14 says: if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.
The US doesn't need Obama or McCain to turn things around, it needs its Christians to stop worrying about who they might offend, to stop being complacent and comfortable in their nice little pews, to stop ignoring God's call, and start praying for God's forgiveness for our country!
He has given much, and much is expected. We worry about gas prices and grocery prices, what about those who have no place to rest their heads at night?! What about those who live in places where if they even mention Jesus' name they risk death? How can Chritians today go to church, sing hymns about following Christ's call and go home without feeling moved in the least bit?
It breaks my heart that I have been so selfish. I pray that God will show me how to use the gifts He has given me to further the work of His kingdom. I'm tired of being complacent, I'm tired of not doing anything. The only way I know I will be truly content is if I am doing the work God made me for.
My prayer today is that as Christians we will have our eyes opened to the grace God has given us and act upon it. As Americans we have been given much, as Christians much is expected of us, let's stop being complacent. Let us pray for healing in our land and in our world.